


Little White Fleecy Hood

by SMANGST



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Crack, In which a lamb defeats a wolf, M/M, Multi, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-09
Updated: 2014-05-09
Packaged: 2018-01-24 02:19:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1588046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SMANGST/pseuds/SMANGST
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Near is known around town for his warm white hood. Light is known for his conquests in the bedroom. The two are about to meet for the first time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little White Fleecy Hood

**Author's Note:**

> This was a gift for a friend of mine, and definitely full of crack. Not to be taken seriously at all.

Not so long ago, in another time and place, there lived a petite young man named Near who was affectionately known throughout his town as Little White Fleecy Hood, so called because he was very pale and was fond of wearing a warm cloak, made of pure white wool. He wasn't crazy about his nickname; he thought it a bit silly, but it didn't prevent him from wearing the cloak. It was his pride and joy. Besides, he was warm and cuddly when all those other fuckers were shivering and complaining of cold. 

It was a rough winter, and a nasty flu was circulating through the town. It soon came to pass that Near's much older (and taller) boyfriend fell ill with that very flu, to the point that he was bedridden. Due to his state, he was rendered fairly incapable of caring for himself, and he called Near's cell phone, asking if he would come by with some soup and medicine, and possibly (hopefully?) give him a sponge bath. 

Near rolled his eyes, thinking Mikami was a little pathetic, and he really didn't want to catch the flu from him. He'd been lucky so far. Nonetheless, he took pity on the poor guy and stopped by the nearby pharmacy to buy some home remedies and several cans of instant soup. If nothing else, maybe the meds he'd bought would knock Mikami out. The thought brought a (very slight) smile to his face as he picked up a facemask to protect himself from any gross germs. Maybe with this, the sponge bath wouldn't be out of the question. Paying for his items, he skipped out.

He'd decided he would walk to his boyfriend's house since, despite the cold, he was always kept toasty warm by his cloak. Besides, it wasn't a very long walk. The high-rise was only a couple of blocks from his own house, though he did have to travel through a somewhat unsavory part of town. Before long, he happened upon a dashingly handsome young man with eyes like cinnamon. Despite the warmth of the color, however, Near thought there was a cold emptiness inside them; he didn't trust him one bit. He didn't know the man, but he knew /of/ him. Though his name was Light, and he was called "the wolf" throughout the town, though Near wasn't certain why.

Light fell into step several paces behind the young man, jamming his hands into his pockets against the chill in the air. He had quite the reputation around town. He was a playboy and a heartbreaker. He was hated by those he'd "conquered" and wanted by those he hadn't. Despite his infamy, the nickname irritated him. Surely they should've been able to think of something more clever than "the wolf". At the moment, he was focused on other things: namely, his next conquest. He knew of Near, of course; who didn't in this town?

"Good evening, Near," he murmured, opting to use Near's real name in case he hated his own nickname. "Where are you going on such a chilly afternoon?"

Near considered ignoring him, but he doubted the other man would give up so easily. He answered quietly, tugging on a curl of pale hair with his free hand. "I'm going to visit my boyfriend." He emphasized that last word. Maybe Light would get the point.

No such luck. "Does this boyfriend have a name?" It wasn't the first time Light had been met with obstacles like this. On occasion, however, his prey's supposed boyfriend or girlfriend was merely a ruse to throw him off track.

"Teru Mikami." Near's answer was succinct, almost as though he was rubbing it in Light's face that it was the truth.

"And you're going to visit... Oho... lucky him, I say. It's nice to have a warm body keeping the cold away on days like this." Light grinned (rather wolfishly) and ran his tongue over his front teeth.

"Hn. He's sick." Why was he entertaining this conversation?

"Oh, what a shame. He must have that bug that's been going around? You know, there's a tea shop not far from here that sells an herbal tea that's supposed to really help with that. Or so I've heard." He shrugged. "If you're interested, I could give you directions."

That wasn't a half bad idea, Near thought, and nodded. "Sure, okay." What was a tiny detour? He had until nightfall, after all.

Light smiled that slow, toothy smile again (and Near found himself understanding, quite suddenly, why The Wolf was so popular around town) and pointed up the street. "Take that road until you reach an intersection, then turn left. You'll have to cross a crosswalk, and the tea shop is on the corner. You can't miss it."

Near nodded, committing the words to memory. Light wasn't so bad after all! "Thank you." Not wanting to waste any time, he headed off in the direction of the tea shop, a bit of a bounce in his step.

Light's smile didn't fade, though it took a somewhat darker tone as he watched Near depart. He knew exactly who Teru Mikami was, having had the pleasure of adding him to his conquests several months prior. Once Near was safely out of sight, he made a beeline for Mikami's apartment.

Once there , he buzzed the apartment, hitting the button on the intercom. A sick, weak voice greeted him and opened the door to let him up immediately, without even checking to see who it was. 'So trusting,' Light thought, appreciating the convenience it provided.

He hummed to himself as he walked down the hallway, thinking that fate must be smiling down upon him when he tried his old key in the lock /and it still worked./ He'd thought Mikami to be smarter than that, but apparently he was wrong. 'Ah well,' he mused. 'At least he has his looks. '

He slipped into the bedroom, locking the door behind him. "Hello, darling. Did you miss me?"

Mikami's eyes widened at the voice. He'd been resting and wasn't wearing his glasses, but he knew that voice anywhere.

"L.. Light? What are you doing here?"

And that's when Light attacked. It wasn't easy, as Mikami was definitely more muscular, but in his weakened state, and sans glasses, Light overtook him after a brief struggle. He stripped him down (more for his own benefit than anything else - Mikami was ripped) and locked him in the closet, gagged with a pair of socks. Once that was taken care of, Light unlocked the door, then removed his own clothes and got into Mikami's bed. He didn't look anything like the other man, but who would be able to resist /his/ charms?

It wasn't long before Near arrived. He'd bought the tea Light had told him about, and he knocked quietly before letting himself in. "Teru-kun, I brought the things you wanted. And also this tea that's supposed to help." He set everything down on the kitchen table and ventured back toward the bedroom. "Teru?" He opened the door and frowned.

Light was in bed, the covers pulled up and over him. He was awake, muscles tensed. Waiting.

"You know... I know you're sick, but you should at least try to have some soup. Or this tea..." He moved closer to the bed, thinking it was actually a bit rude of Mikami to ignore him like that, considering he was nice enough to bring everything over to him. It did strike him as odd that he wasn't snoring. Usually he kept half the damn neighborhood awake. Settling a hand onto what he assumed was his boyfriend's shoulder, he gave him a gentle shake. "Hey, wake up."

That was Light's cue. He sat up immediately and yanked Near down into the bed with him, smirking victoriously. "Now you're mine," he said, pinning the young man beneath him.

Near froze. He didn't even /breathe/, staring up at the (admittedly exquisite) man over him. He regained his composure after a moment, wetting his lips. "..let me up."

Light ignored the request, taking Near's chin in his fingers and turning his face toward his own. "Let's have a look at my prize... so very nice." He leaned in close and took a long sniff of Near's hair. "So sweet..."

Near jerked away from his grip, his own gaze cold and steely. He strengthened his voice, saying rather loudly. "Get /off/ me, you pervert."

Light merely smirked, his hand traveling south. He'd worked hard for his prize, and he was going to take his time enjoying it. "Shh..."

However, it wasn't in the cards. As fate would have it, Mikami's doctor (and close friend) had decided to pay him a housecall that evening. He'd been given instructions to let himself in, and so he did, walking straight back to the bedroom. He paused for only a moment in the doorway, then leapt into action, knocking Light off Near and even off the bed. "Near, grab my bag. Hurry!"

Near wasted no time, handing the doctor his bag. He was shaken, but refused to show it. He was worried about Mikami, however. Where was he? He swallowed, voice soft. "Thank you, Gevanni."

Light was struggling beneath the doctor, but pinned in such a way that resistance was futile. Dr. Gevanni was quick about administering a sedative, which rendered him unconscious in a matter of seconds. Gevanni stood, panting softly. He was winded from the struggle, and the rush of adrenaline. "Are you okay?"

Near nodded, taking a few steps away from Light and avoiding Gevanni's gaze. He'd always found him to be attractive, which made it awkward whenever he was visiting with Mikami. Speaking of awkward... "where's Mikami?"

He was answered with a muffled sound from the closet. Gevanni was closest, so he went to investigate, opening the door. "...found him." He knelt to untie Mikami, ignoring (with some difficulty) his state of undress.

Near went over to help, removing the wad of socks from Mikami's mouth, glad his heart rate was beginning to slow again.

Once Mikami was untied and somewhat clothed again, the three sat on the end of the bed, looking at the unconscious Light. "He should pay," said Mikami. "But how?"

They discussed the matter of punishment for nearly an hour and finally determined that it should match the crime. It also came to light in that hour that Mikami and Gevanni had also harbored the same sorts of thoughts as Near. Therefore, they set about their plan.

Light awakened in quite an uncomfortable position. He was bound tightly and suspended from what he assumed as a coat rack. And he had a clear view of the bed, where... well. Free entertainment.

He wondered if he could count this as 3 more conquests. Shrugging as best he could while hanging like he was, he decided it would count, at least to him, and sat back to enjoy the show. Some punishment. A guy could get used to this.


End file.
